posted 11 Oct 2010 08:23 by Geoff Woodcock
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updated 11 Oct 2010 08:27
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Time-wasters!! Arghhhhh. Look, I understand that it's no secret that slow play winds me up. You've only got to mention the words "Ray McGroarty" to me and I feel a chilling pain down my spine. I try to block out the memories of how he'd go through a complete routine before every serve; walk around the court; pick up ball (slowly); walk to side wall; take off glasses; wipe glasses (for ages); put on glasses; walk to service area; bounce the ball 50 times... arghhhhhhh..... It used to drive me completely nuts, and it won him a few matches too. :0(
Thankfully age and womanising has put a big enough gap between us that I can put the nightmare of Ray behind me, I hope. But it was just the other day when I came up against one of Ray's disciples! I was playing 1st string in a team match for the Uni. My opponent got the nod to go on court and, somehow, managed to take 20 minutes to get ready. After 10 minutes of warming up on my own I got bored and stood waiting., wondering where the hell he'd got to. Just to really take the biscuit, when he finally arrived on court he started stretching!!! The match finally started and in between every rally my opponent took at least 10 seconds longer than the norm to serve or be ready to return serve. It might not sound like a long time but if you get prepare to serve and then pause and count 10 seconds you'll understand how disruptive this can be. So "all part of game", or "clever tactics" I might hear you say. But is it!?
The England Squash rules state, "CONTINUITY OF PLAY (Rule 7) - Play is expected to be continuous in each game once a player has started serving. There should be no delay between the end of one rally and the start of the next one. Apply Rule 17 when this occurs (conduct warning).
Unfortunately it is one of those rules that's hard to enforce. For example, my opponent accused ME of being "too fast"! What can I say to that!? I am a bit of a wippet! :0D |
posted 6 Oct 2010 02:25 by Geoff Woodcock
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updated 6 Oct 2010 02:32
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Does anyone use those little rubber shock dampeners or whatever-they're-called? Y'know, the one's that you can buy in loads of different shapes, or with a smiley face on or what-not. Is it just me or are they the most pointless accessory ever!?! I played a league match against Vivek the other day and he was adamant (as sure as eggs is eggs) that these little bits of moulded rubber-waste made a positive difference to his game, or at least the feel of contact with the ball. Now call me cynical, but I've seen Vivek play with and without this over-priced grommet and there is no difference! However, every now and then he makes contact with it on the ball and both the grommet and the ball fly off at rocket speeds in different directions. Perhaps it's this distraction that gives the player 'an edge' or more still maybe it's the 20 second scramble around the floor trying to stomp on the damned thing that buys him more time. Whatever your opinion, you won't change mine!
Verdict: Save the rubber for the bedroom.
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